Invisible

Just realized how much I can hate myself, when the opportunity presents itself. Today, for the umpteenth time, I wanted to go back into my shell, never to come back out again and just be a non-existent entity in the background no one notices. I tried several times today to make myself invisible to the world, remain unnoticed, but someone breaks that shell of invisibility. I could never have expressed this to another person, but it is easier in writing. All said and done, a good day to all of you!

My New Friend

I got this wonderful new friend (let's give a name - X), who has been a ray of originality in an otherwise unoriginal life (the epitome of commonness). I find X to be refreshingly original. I mean, I'm not exaggerating or saying that X is perfect (X is not perfect in many ways, but then, is anyone?), but what I mean is that X's thoughts are his/her own, not like mine or those of many others, gathered and collected over the years. That is a change in a world which thrives on "Copy" and "Paste"! So, let X's originality live on forever! :-) 

Ironic!

Jordan awoke. He had a hell of a hangover and his head was cracking. He took the bottle of aspirin by his bed and popped a couple in his mouth. Walking over to the basin, he washed his face and took a look at his unshaved haggard face. He had still not recovered from Julia's death, the fact that he drove the car making it worse. He cleaned up and walked over to fetch the newspaper. Opening it, he read the main headline – ‘Drug Addict Suicides’. The word 'suicide' kept flashing in his head, though he had no idea why. After scanning through the newspaper, he closed it and switched on the TV. Fox News - The red-head reading the news was explaining how the town of Yountville had its first suicide in 76 years when drug addict Rosie took her own life. Same story from the newspaper. He sat down and browsed through the channels - nothing worth watching. Getting up to make breakfast, the fact that he hadn't eaten since last afternoon dawned on him. He made toast and marmalade and set it down on the kitchen counter. As he sat down to eat, he noticed the wedding picture that Julie had framed and kept beside the stove. She had worn a flowing white gown and he, a tuxedo. They had been so happy that day, little realising that their marriage would end because of a few bottles of beer. He thought of how she must be feeling now - absurd thoughts. He dismissed them, but it kept coming back. He suddenly caught the word 'suicide' on the TV and all of a sudden, he had an intense longing to join her on her journey to the other land. He sat down for over an hour, thinking about their marriage, dreams and the child they would never have. Having made up his mind on the spur, he phoned his mum. Two rings and the familiar click - "Hello mum?”.  "Hey hon, how are you feeling today?", his mom asked. "Pretty good", he said as his voice cracked a bit. "Are you feeling all right? Do you want me come over?", his mom asked, concerned. "Its fine mum. Talk to you later. Bye", he said, sensing that he could not talk further without breaking down. "Take care Jordan”. Call me up if you ever need anything." - Click. The line went dead. He set down the phone and finished his cold breakfast. Determined, he put on his jeans and went out, locking the apartment. He met Mrs. Lawrence on the stairs - "I'm really sorry for your loss. She was a sweet girl". Jordan simply nodded and went on. Opening the door to the street, he felt the warm sunlight on his face. A beautiful sunny spring day in Yountville. He walked towards the pier. He saw children and adults at the beach enjoying the sun. He could have been here with Julia, had it not been for the cursed accident. He saw the blue water and the pub where both of them usually came for a drink after work. He walked to the edge of the pier and stared at the gloomy depths of the ocean. He saw a couple nearby, pushing a pram. He heard the baby's laugh and felt positive all of a sudden. He could start all over again. The pain would subside and he could live a new life. He felt ashamed that he had been a coward, choosing death over the pain.

Wendy had been cycling on the pier since morning, but as she now went down the pier, she felt something was wrong. She felt uneasy as the cycle went faster and faster and the brake levers were getting hard to press. She realised that the brakes were jammed and jumped off the cycle just before the end of the pier. She saw a man standing on the edge and shouted for him to move. The cycle hit the man and he fell into the ocean.

The last thing Jordan heard before he hit the cold water was people screaming. He lost his consciousness soon after.

<2 days later>

The red-head reading the news reported, "The man who recently drowned due to an unfortunate accident in the Yountville bay area has been identified as Mr. Jordan Hadlee, a recent widower". The newspaper had a large photo of Jordan in the front page, with obituaries written by friends, family and colleagues. He was laid to rest next to Julia in the family plot in the cemetery. On the marble stone head were the words - 'RIP Jordan'.

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What do you think guys? Please lemme know. Thanks.

First Post!

Hi Guys! All of you will be wondering why I named my blog Sink Arc, right? Well, I just thought of the way my life was turning into one that many others before me had experienced and how I could not make any difference to it. So, 'Sinking Arc' refers to the downward graph of my life. Anyway, I will post soon. A very happy New Year to all of you!